The Beggar's Lesson

We recently had the good fortune of going on our honeymoon to Italy and France. Fantastic countries with great food, usually friendly people and amazing sights. One of the interesting things I noted were the number of beggars in the streets. There were far more than we are familiar with in Canada (though admittedly far less than I've seen in Tanzania and other parts of the world). However, one experience in particular stood out for me.

I saw a man sitting on the ground smoking contentedly on a cigarette... casually put out his cigarette and then ask for money.

This was interesting for me because it led me to examine the morality of the decision. Now, in Islam we are encouraged to give to the needy and the poor, however there is also the deep belief against harming the self and the intellect. I personally cannot stand cigarettes and know that this individual asking for money is subsidizing the tobacco industry, so I feel that giving in this circumstance is not correct morally, by doing so I would be giving some money to something I feel is wrong.

What about other cases? How many people who are begging are going to use the money they gain from begging on personal expenses that the giver would feel are wrong or unwarranted? Does it matter? Or rather, did it matter? Because when I think of that I wonder - the issue of misuse of donations had to have occurred even during the time of the Holy Prophet (peace be upon him and his family), yet still, the Prophet urged Muslims to give to beggars and the needy. How would he expect individuals to discern which beggars were going to use their gains in a positive manner and which would use it frivolously?

When I think about it... maybe it doesn't and didn't matter. Maybe the gain from giving to a needy person is simply meant to be enjoyed by the giver and the consequences of the action lie purely in the hands of the receiver. This doesn't mean that I personally can condone giving to someone whom I know will spend the money on alcohol or drugs or cigarettes, rather if one does so with a full heart and intent focused on helping another - The good far outweighs the bad.

Maybe I'm not blessed enough, maybe I'm too cynical... I couldn't do it. I can't do it... yet. However, I hold out hope that someday, I'll believe in my fellow human beings enough to be able to give to a person who asks without questioning their motives or what they'll do with it. I'm sure that's what our Prophet had in mind with the revelation of Surah 93 Ayat 10 of the Qur'an, "and for he who asks (begs/petitions), do not repel (him)"

To giving with a full heart.

Finding God

Rabrindranath Tagore wrote an interesting short story about a man who was searching for God which I've slightly modified. Now the man looked everywhere for God and eventually became completely engrossed in his search.

One day, the man saw a signpost saying, "This is the house of God." with a long set of stairs nearby. The man ran up the stairs until he reached a house. He removed his shoes and approached the door carefully... and froze with fear.

The man began to think, "What will I do with God? I've been searching for God for years, but I don't remember why. What will I talk to God about. What can I do once I've found God?" The man quickly walked backwards, grabbed his shoes and ran as fast as he could, afraid that God would hear him and come out. Since then, the man has once again been searching for God, looking everywhere except for the house with the sign.

This story is very interesting on many fronts. On first read, a part of me said, "but God is everywhere, He does not reside in a single house." but then I began to think on the messages embedded in the story. God does reside everywhere but there are some places where it is easier to access the Divine. One of these places is within the self through meditation and love... and what about the key question the man cannot answer? Can I answer that question? What will I do if I find God?

It's a very tricky question and a scary one too. Upon finding God, if one is so fortunate, does one lose their sense of self? Are thoughts of "what will I do?" moot? Does the finding of God render knowledge to the individual? Will one simply know? It's truly a tricky thought, because it can act as a barrier or as an inspiration.

At the end... does it matter? Does one need a reason or a purpose to search for and find the Divine? Will a reason hasten the search?

The answer lies beyond the door, all we have to do, is open it.

What is love? - Wedding Speech

Love is ineffable, indescribable, beautiful. Yet, it is one of the key things that makes us human.
In our lives, most of us experience some form of love, something that makes life worth
living. Yet, even with the fact that most of us have been touched by love… It is impossible to
articulate. What, truly IS love?

Love is a smile, love is a kiss, it’s an emotion, it’s a mental exercise.
Love is meant for God. That’s why we have been given the gift of being able to love… so that
we can love God. God put us here, so that we could recognize His creation, so that we could
experience it fully, so we could love Him through it. Loving God is a tricky thing though. God is
everywhere and in everything… and that’s what we truly fall in love with. When we love one
another, we love that reflection of God that we see in that person. This applies to all forms of
love. When a mother loves her child, when a brother loves his sibling, and the love between
friends. We care for another because we can, but we love each other because we must.

Different people reflect God in differing ways, yet none of them are bad because wherever
you look, however you choose to perceive it, if you try, you’ll see God. All I can say from my
experience is that eventually, it feels perfect. Eventually you find someone, and you love them,
and you realize that this, right here, right now, is the best reflection of God for you. The one
that makes your heart tingle, the one that puts those butterflies in your stomach, and the one
that keeps you awake at night.

And maybe, that’s what love is. Love makes us so happy, love energizes us, love drives us to go
to the ends of the earth because…

Love… is seeing God.

Life and Death

A man recently committed suicide... Before doing so, he published a webpage detailing why.

I saw a copy of the webpage (the original was taken down soon after being posted) here http://www.zeroshare.info/

On his webpage, Martin Manley talked about the struggles people face as we age, he decided that he did not want to face those struggles, he wanted to take things into his own hands, he wanted to choose the time and place of his death, so he did.

The term suicide is associated with a great deal of stigma and there have been various reasons offered for this. This gentleman was actually very eloquent. His perspectives on life and death are worth reading. He discusses the fact that he did not commit suicide for any traditional reason, but rather, the end-goal seemed to be control (my words, not his), control of his destiny, control of what he will be remembered for. I'm sure many of us have thought of an "age-limit" where we at this point in time we would presumably be happy to die. For those who have thought of this, it may be that we would ideally live to be 70, for some it would be a lower, or higher number, regardless, very few people with whom I've had this discussion state that they would like to live as long as physically possible, because they don't wish to suffer. They don't want to be a burden on others, they don't want to live, simply for the sake of living.

The arguments Martin Manley makes are very logically sound. Why would anyone want to "push through" their latter years when these years are filled with the greatest challenges?

But then, we look at human nature... It is in our nature to survive. We NEED to survive. People "fight for their lives" regularly... Why? We fight through pain, through suffering, through deprivation and hardship to live. What makes us want to live so badly that we can and do push through terrible circumstances?

I think that if one looks simply at Martin Manley's arguments from the perspective he offers, they seem very sound, but one needs to look at them from a spiritual perspective as well...

At times, even when a person seems to be suffering, we cannot understand their spiritual experiences... in fact, they may not understand their spiritual experiences either. Even a person who is in a vegetative state has some unknowns... We don't know whether that individual can have any experiences, and so, we are unable to judge.

If we look at a human life as a conglomeration of the physical and the spiritual, we may find that the individual undergoes numerous transformations. However, even the negative transformations that accompany injury, age, disease, etc... may still be necessary for a spiritual journey. I know this may not bring relief to a person who is truly suffering, but sometimes that is a necessary aspect of life. Cutting one's own life short is a decision that assumes that there is nothing left to live for, when in reality, there is a spiritual journey still left. If someone looks in the right places, they'll always find something to live for. That is why we struggle to stay alive. Yes, we are instinctively driven to survive at all costs, but we don't choose en masse to die because we all have something to live for, whether we recognize it or not and whether it is physical or spiritual. Life is not simply an obstacle to salvation, nor is death the relief of suffering. Life is a pathway, and death is the gate. The destination depends on where the gate is and where the path has taken you.

My secret fear

I live in perpetual fear that someday, at some time, a seeker of truth will come up to me and ask me, "what's the true purpose of prayers and ritual? If faith and intention are the most important things, what's the purpose of differences in physical practice?"

It's a tricky question. The essence of the question is asking what is the true purpose of physical expression, or does physical expression have a true purpose when dealing with mindful intention?

Prayer acts as a bridge between the physical and the esoteric. It plays a vital role in bringing our spiritual selves into our lives, yet we always talk about the intention behind the prayer being the most powerful and most important part... but what about the physical?

I mean, when I hear someone reciting their prayers and I hear obvious mistakes, I often take it upon myself to correct those mistakes, because in this way I help that person... right?

but, if the intention is the most important part of the prayer... then why correct it? Why worry about the physical manifestation? Why does it matter if a person does not raise their hands when asking God for something? Why does it matter if an individual recite their prayers correctly?

Obviously, it doesn't matter THAT much... obviously the intention is the most important part of it... but does that mean that the physical aspects are unimportant? Does that mean that we should allow mistakes to creep into our practices... In fact, why even cling to the practices of the past? We are praying by intention now! In fact, why even differentiate religions? As long as we agree on basics, let's just lump everyone together!!!

There are some problems with this train of thought... Prayers and their physical expressions are important towards not only expressing the spiritual, but also to establishing a spiritual identity. This does not mean that any particular identity is superior to another, far from it, but the essence of the physical action works towards creating a sense of self within a religious whole. When I pray to God, I do so surrounded by others in a chorus, a litany. Be it silent or loud. That sense of community is a part of being closer to God, because through this community God's presence is felt in our daily lives. The physical actions that accompany any prayer are essential and cannot be ignored, they are important. How we say our prayers, how we hold our hands... Although these things should never be a source of conflict amongst people, nonetheless, they hold weight in our collective consciousness, and so they should. Whether we greet each other in a unique manner, or commune with God in differing ways, "prayers" and rituals in this manner serve a greater purpose. They let you be you, while belonging...

Maybe that's what I'll say when my greatest fear is realized?

The Art of Conversation

I had a very odd conversation today. I was speaking to a Psychiatrist (there is an unjustified taboo against that phrase but just to clarify, it was to ask for help with a volunteering project), and I had this strange sense that our conversation was odd. I felt awkward and couldn't figure out why as I'm usually confident in most conversations. Maybe he didn't want to talk to me? Maybe he was sending out vibes regarding not being interested in the volunteer opportunity? Maybe... Then it hit me.

It felt awkward and odd because this other member of the conversation was intently listening to everything I was saying. He was completely silent while I was speaking, I didn't feel any sense of being... rushed...

After the conversation, my first thoughts went to why it was so awkward, what had he done, or what was he trying to tell me through silent language? That made me think, was it really a message or was I the one who handled the conversation the "wrong" way?

Looking back at other conversations I've participated in, it seems as though oftentimes everyone is anxiously trying to state their opinion as quickly as possible... often we miss opportunities to communicate and to listen. Thinking back on that makes me a bit sad. Just reflecting on this "awkward" conversation led me to learn so much. How much would I have learned in my life if I was a much better listener?

We only live for a short period of time, and maybe that's what gives us such a sense of urgency in our lives. We need to do everything we can... right? Or rather, is it more important to do everything we should do and must do, and do it with a sense of intention? I don't know exactly which way is the right way, but I feel as though doing a few things with intention and with love would lead to more satisfaction in our lives and our societies. Maybe if we all just took a moment to breathe and listen we would hear more. Maybe that's one of the many paths we can take to God. To listen to each other.

What do you say? Please allow me to listen.

Time Machine

A time machine would be a wonderful tool. We could use it to undo many things in the past that we regret. We could use it to better our world, ourselves, those around us... but it can't exist...

Why?

From a physics perspective, some physicists believe that we are 3 dimensional beings, existing in a 3 dimensional world, able to experience in 3 dimensions, with just a touch of a 4th thrown in. That 4th dimension is time.

The way in which time works in this theory would be similar to a river (not the water in the river, the actual river itself). The river exists as a continuous stream from beginning to end. All aspects of the river are present. Our experience of this river would be as a rock embedded in the riverbed. We would experience the river constantly changing and moving around us, and it is, however the actual river itself exists as a whole at all times, only our perception of the specific river in our surroundings changes.

This means that our perception of time determines our experience of it. Time itself is not a linear concept, however we perceive it as such. This in turn determines our conception of time.

So, we can't change the past, the present or the future... A very interesting argument indeed.

From a spiritual perspective I like this theory with some reservations. I do agree with the theory that time itself exists outside the human perception and that all aspects of time exist simultaneously (that is, that in reality, past, present and future happen at the same time), however it leaves me wondering about the importance of perception in determining reality. If something is perceived in a certain light, does the perception of it alter it's reality? The same argument that Heisenberg made modified. You can determine the speed of an electron or it's position in space, but not both... Your perception of the electron in terms of discovering it's speed alters the reality of it's position and vice versa.

I wonder if the same can be said of time? Time exists in a single continuous stream, but my perceiving time as this moment must in some way alter it...

I can't know, all I do know is that my perception of time tells me it's limited and a precious commodity that I have only a very limited amount of.

Let's take a moment to think on that.